I realize that I'm generalizing here, but as is often the case when I generalize, I don't care.

quote by Dave Barry
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Scientists now believe that the primary biological function of breasts is to make males stupid.

quote by Dave Barry
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Gravity is a contributing factor in nearly 73 percent of all accidents involving falling objects.

quote by Dave Barry
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I want a pit crew... I hate the procedure I currently have to go through when I have car problems.

quote by Dave Barry
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I am not the only person who uses his computer mainly for the purpose of diddling with his computer.

quote by Dave Barry
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Bill Gates is a very rich man today... and do you want to know why? The answer is one word: versions.

quote by Dave Barry
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The problem with winter sports is that - follow me closely here - they generally take place in winter.

quote by Dave Barry
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People who want to share their religious views with you almost never want you to share yours with them.

quote by Dave Barry
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If God had wanted us to be concerned for the plight of the toads, he would have made them cute and furry.

quote by Dave Barry
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Geographically, Ireland is a medium-sized rural island that is slowly but steadily being consumed by sheep.

quote by Dave Barry
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