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ToddMichael St. Pierre

Belinda Ate a Booger

Belinda ate a booger,
On our field trip to Kentucky,
I can't believe she did that,
It's just so very yucky!
I think it's really nasty,
I'd die if they all knew,
One time in the first grade...

I ate a booger too!

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Way Down Yonder

The Thingamabobs and the Diddleysquats,
Ate platypus-puke and hot booger-tots.
The Tiddleywinks and the Snickerdoodles,
Had roasted head lice with stink-bug noodles.
They played all day on the purple seesaw...

Then headed on down to the Mardi Gras!

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Risk

Oh death may say of dreams in youth -
'You never knew his private truth.'
So much we weren't prepared for,

Hearts should be nurtured and cared for.
I stepped into this dance with you,
I chose to take this chance with you!

Facing risk, I knew the dangers...
For when the dancing ends,
Though many remain friends,

Some become
Strangers!

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Gargoyles

Pet gargoyles grunt and snore and cough,
But sadly you can't turn them off!
The belch and wheeze and sneeze and spit,
I cannot bear the thought of it!
They slurp and burp, they howl and growl,
They moan and groan; they smell so foul!
Gargoyles gargle, and pass lots of gas,
Their gas it smells like sassafras!
If you get a gargoyle have no fear...

From their FARTS you can make root-beer!

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Did You Show Up Just to Throw Up?

Did you show up just to throw up?
Did you plan it all this way?
Did you show up just to throw up?
Just to ruin my tenth birthday?
Cuz you gobbled up my ice cream
And three-quarters of my cake!
You destroyed my lovely party,
OH, it's more than I can take!
You ate every yellow candle,
As I stood there screaming, 'GROW UP! '
God, it's more than I can handle...
Did you show up just to throw up?

Little kid, I think you did!

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Lily Licked the Toilet

Lily licked the toilet,
And then she licked the floor.
You can bet I'll never
Kiss Lily anymore!
Lily licked the toilet,
And then she licked the sink.
She's full of germs and worms,
At least that's what I think.
Lily licked the toilet,
And then she licked the tub.
It's safe to say her tongue
Could use a real good scrub!
She was the cutest pooch! (To Smooch)
Why'd she have to spoil it?
Nothing's been the same since…
Lily licked the toilet!

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The Maggots in my Meatloaf

The maggots in my meatloaf,
Often cause me too much strife.
They take advantage of me,
And they need to get a life!
The fattest one he asked me...
'May I have a piece of ham?
Will you make some fish and chips?
Or a little leg of lamb? '
The skinny one she asked me...
'Could you spare a yummy yam?
Do you have extra ketchup?
Are you out of red plum jam? '
The maggots in my meatloaf,
They sure have a lot of nerve!
I don't mind if they eat here...

But my kitchen is SELF-SERVE! ! !

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This Just In

Seems the TVs are spoiling the children,
Wide screens to baby-sit and console.
No worlds to explore,
Beyond the back door,
No life outside of remote control.

Now, the TVs are teaching the children,
Substitute guidance: Just sit and watch.
They plop and they slouch,
Entranced on a couch,
No time to read or to play hopscotch.

Yes, the TVs are raising the children,
Kids stare at the screens until dizzy.
At times they’ve become,
The nannies to some,
As the parents are just too BUSY!

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My Poopasaurus

Have you seen my Poopasaurus?
Oh she poops in great big piles.
She’s a prehistoric creature,
And her poop goes on for miles!

Can you help me to locate her?
Though your nose won’t like it much,
If you see her please remember,
You can look but do not touch!

Do not touch my Poopasaurus,
Or she may just poop on you.
She escaped me just this morning,
When I took her out to poo.

Have you seen my Poopasaurus?
She’s the only pet I’ve got.
She’s cute and kind, but keep in mind…

She poops an awful lot!

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Sister of Mine

Sister of mine, please know that I miss you,
As miles seperate us in life as we roam.
I close my eyes and we're still together…
Splashing in puddles as we skip toward home.

Picking wish-flowers and making mud-pies,
In fields of Summer, under apricot skies.
Oh it really does seem like yesterday,
And I'll always remember us this way.

Sister of mine, please know that I love you,
No distance on earth, could alter this truth.
Not a day passes, that I don't think of you,
And far-away playgrounds in dreams of youth.

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