In Hollywood a marriage is a success if it outlasts milk.

quote by Rita Rudner
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To attract men, I wear a perfume called "New Car Interior".

quote by Rita Rudner
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To attract men, I wear a perfume called ""New Car Interior.""

quote by Rita Rudner
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I was a vegetarian until I started leaning toward the sunlight.

quote by Rita Rudner
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My mother buried three husbands - and two of them were only napping.

quote by Rita Rudner
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My mother buried three husbands... and two of them were only napping.

quote by Rita Rudner
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I wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird religious cult.

quote by Rita Rudner
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When I eventually met Mr. Right I had no idea that his first name was Always.

quote by Rita Rudner
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My boyfriend and I broke up. He wanted to get married and I didn't want him to.

quote by Rita Rudner
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Most turkeys taste better the day after my mother's tasted better the day before.

quote by Rita Rudner
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