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Chris Rock

George Bush hates midgets.

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Welcome to the 77th and last Oscars.

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You don't pay taxes - they take taxes.

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A man is only as faithful as his options.

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Men are only as unfaithful as their options.

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Gay people got a right to be as miserable as everybody else.

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Yeah, I love being famous. It's almost like being white, y'know?

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A white boy that makes C's in college can make it to the White House.

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School shootings were invented by blacks... and stolen by the white man.

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I live in a neighborhood so bad that you can get shot while getting shot.

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