I was trying to daydream, but my mind kept wandering.

quote by Steven Wright
Added by Lucian Velea
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If you can't hear me, it's because I'm in parentheses.

quote by Steven Wright
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My neighbor has a circular driveway... he can't get out.

quote by Steven Wright
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Curiosity killed the cat, but for awhile I was a suspect.

quote by Steven Wright
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I got this powdered water - now I don't know what to add.

quote by Steven Wright
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Curiosity killed the cat, but for a while I was a suspect.

quote by Steven Wright
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Right now I'm having amnesia and deja vu at the same time.

quote by Steven Wright
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Everywhere is within walking distance if you have the time.

quote by Steven Wright
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It's a small world, but I wouldn't want to have to paint it.

quote by Steven Wright
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If you were going to shoot a mime, would you use a silencer?

quote by Steven Wright
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