My bedspread isn't washable. Since my bedding has to be washed every day, I'll have to throw it out.

quote by April Winchell
Added by Lucian Velea
Comment! | Vote! | Copy!

I'd like to run for office someday, but I'm afraid my ability to spell might give me an unfair advantage.

quote by April Winchell
Added by Lucian Velea
Comment! | Vote! | Copy!

I have found that many other countries will buy off on anything American. As much as they hate us, they want to be us more than anything.

quote by April Winchell
Added by Lucian Velea
Comment! | Vote! | Copy!

Like every aspect of cancer I've weathered thus far, today's experience was not at all demoralizing, expensive or humiliating. No, it was just plain fun.

quote by April Winchell
Added by Lucian Velea
Comment! | Vote! | Copy!

The theme of the party was Neverland Ranch, so guests were asked to come as anyone or anything associated with Michael Jackson. It was all very disturbing.

quote by April Winchell
Added by Lucian Velea
Comment! | Vote! | Copy!

I am severely distracted these days. It's hard to sit in front of the computer, uploading bad music for hours, when you have a wonderful boyfriend who treats you like a Goddess.

quote by April Winchell
Added by Lucian Velea
Comment! | Vote! | Copy!

Orphans, dead parents, lonely children at Christmas, morose spoken word recordings, everything you love about the holidays. Move the turkey over so you can fit your head in the oven.

quote by April Winchell
Added by Lucian Velea
Comment! | Vote! | Copy!

Usually, jet lag is not this big of an issue for me. I'm not sure why I'm so disoriented this time. It could be due to the amount of chocolate and french fries I've eaten in the last two and a half weeks.

quote by April Winchell
Added by Lucian Velea
Comment! | Vote! | Copy!