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Sheldon Allan Silverstein

Daddy What If?

(Daddy what if the sun stop shinin' what would happen then?)
If the sun stopped shinin' you'd be so surprised
You'd stare at the heavens with wide open eyes
And the wind would carry your light to the skies
And the sun would start shinin' again
(Daddy what if the wind stopped blowin' what would happen then?)
If the wind stopped blowin' then the land would be dry
And your boat wouldn't sail son and your kite wouldn't fly
And the grass would see your troubles and she'd tell the wind
And the wind would start blowin' again
(But daddy what if the grass stopped growin' what would happen then?)
If the grass stopped growin' why you'd probably cry
And the ground would be watered by the tears from your eyes
And like your love for me the grass would grow so high
Yes the grass would start growin' again
(But daddy what if I stopped lovin' you what would happen then?)
If you stopped lovin' me then the grass would stop growin'
The sun would stop shinin' and the wind would stop blowin'
So you see if you wanna keep this old world a goin'
You better start lovin' me again again you better start lovin' me again

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Pour Me Another Tequila Sheila

(Chorus)
Pour me another tequila, Sheila.
Take off that red satin dress.
'Cause I crossed the border,
And I beat the dealer for all of that gold in Juarez.
I feel like ol' Pancho Villa, Sheila,
And I've got the pesos to spend,
So pour me another tequila, Sheila.
And lay down and love me again.

No I can't tell you about it.
Don't mind the gun by my bed,
But I feel kind'a naked without it,
And it eases the fears in my head.
I never trusted in woman,
But Sheila I trust you tonight.
So pass me the salt and a lemon,
Bend down and blow out the light.

(Chorus)

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Alimony

Alimony alimony I work till my fingers are bloody and boney
Me oh my oh goodness sake I'm paying for my mistake
She calls it alimony alimony yeah you single men may think it's funny
Till one of these days you're gonna wake and find you're payin' for your mistake

Pom pom I walk around ragged like a low-down bum
I can't afford to weigh myself or buy a stick of gum
It's the same old story with a little more blues in it
I'm payin' for it while someone else is usin' it
Alimony alimony I thought I bought steak and it was all baloney
My heart and back are both about to break from payin' for my mistake yeah
[ harmonica ]
Yeah I walk around ragged like a low down bum
I can't afford to weigh myself or buy a stick of gum
Why it's the same old story with a little more blues in it
I'm payin' for it while someone else is usin' it
Alimony alimony thought I bought steak and it was just baloney
And every penny that I make goes to payin' for my mistake

Oh yeah payin' for my mistake every Wednesday

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Grizzly Bear

Yeah they call me Grizzly Bear got long black grizzly hair
Walk down the street and everybody stop and stare
Ohohoh well I'm wild and wooly and free
And so you'd better not mess with me
Lemme tell you that I howl yowl growl like a grizzly bear

They say there go Grizzly Bear got no clothes to wear
They say I'm all hung up bein' nowhere
Yeah but the girls they love my clows and my great big chompin' jaws
Lemme tell you that I howl yowl and growl like a grizzly bear

Well now I can't be chained and I can't be tamed and they can't kill my desire
So baby gimme a hug I'll be your bearskin rug
And I'll lie in front of your fire on winter
Baby if you dare why don't you come on down to my lair
And if you got some money to share I'll be waitin' for you there
Hey you know I'm gonna on strong and we can hug'n mate the whole week long
Lemme tell you that I howl yowl a growl like a grizzly bear
[ piano ]
(Yeah watch out baby here I come again)

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Son Of A Scoundrel

Big Barney Fitch, he got soddenly rich
He got a big fancy house in Melbourne
With buckets of loot and big black leather boots
Acting so haughty and well-born

But we of Australia, we're children of convicts
And some of us wear it quite proudly
So as he rides by in his carriage so fine
I wave and I call to him loudly

Refrain:
Was your grandma a whore, was your grandpa a thief
Were they forgers and grafters who fell to their grief
If you're born of Australia, I know who ya be
You're the son of a son of a scoundrel like me

Maggie McKay's got a sweet-lovin' way
And I know that she does adore me
But her parents, they feel it would be a bad deal
They say that she's much too good for me

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Sylvia's Mother

Sylvia's mother says Sylvia's busy,
too busy to come to the phone .
Sylvia's mother says Sylvia's trying
to start a new life of her own.
Sylvia's mother says 'Sylvia's happy...
So why don't you leave her alone?'

And the operator says
'Forty cents more, for the next three minutes.'
Please Mrs. Avery, I've just got to talk to her
I'll only keep her a while
Please Mrs. Avery, just want to tell her
Goodbye !

Sylvia's mother says Sylvia's packing,
she's gonna be leaving today.
Sylvia's mother says Sylvia's marrying
a fellah down Galveston way .
Sylvia's mother says 'Please don't say nothing
to make her start crying and stay.'

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Judy

The waitress with the orange hair keeps motionin' me to hurry up and leave
I gulp my coffee - burn my mouth - grab up my coat and slippin' out
I smear a streak of mustard down my sleeve
And the guy behind the register takes my bread and shakes his head
And looks at me as if I've blown his mind
Hey, I just come here for some coffee…hope I'm not waistin' anybody's time.
And Judy I'm slowly movin' back to you
And I wish that I could say I'll treat you better than I used to
It's just I'm learnin' lots of things I never knew back then
Judy I'm slowly movin' back again
That blue eyed barracuda smiles and tells me she could she could use some brand new clothes
She grabs my leg with a wink, asks if I want another drink
She's not the campfire girl you might suppose
But she's so busy tellin' me her troubles I don't think she's got time
For any kind of trouble small as mine
Hey, I just come here for nothin'… hope I'm not waistin' anybody's time
I stop here on the corner, but that red faced cop says move along your way
My toes are cold, my nose is numb, I got no feeling in my thumb
I think I just might stop inside that church and maybe pray
But they pass the plate and look at me when it turns out that I ain't got a dime

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Come After Jinny

He'll be comin' down the road at the break of day
His head thrown back and his guns tied low
He's comin' after Jinny wants to take her away but I ain't gonna let her go

Oh he boasted in town but she loved him he said she'd be his with the sun
He said anyone try to stop him would be just one more notch on his gun
They say that he's headstrong and handsome his hair's blowin' wild and free
And they got a hold I ain't comin' cause he's a lot younger than me
And he'll be comin' down the road...

He hasn't had much education he ain't worked a day in his life
He's livin' with some older woman they say she's another man's wife
But she wants him needs him and loves him she buys him his clothes and his meals
When she finds he's gone she'll be prayin' and Lord I know just how she feels
Because he's comin' down the road...

The sun's at his back as he's comin' the smile is cruel on his lip
His right hand is slowly descendin' to the sixgun that rest on his hip
Then his lower lip strated tremble and he started cryin' as he looked up at me
And I picked him up I said son you're only four years old

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I Once Knew A Woman

Well now I once knew a woman listen while I tell you all about her yeah
And the first time I seen her I knew I couldn't live without her
Well now she swore she'd love me all her life and I knew I'd do the same
God damn but I don't even remember her name I don't remember her name

Well now I once knew a woman and oh listen while I'm tellin' it to ya yeah
She had big brown eyes the kind that could look right through ya
Now that she looked in my soul with those big brown eyes
Got a feelin' like I never knew hey come to think of it those eyes were blue
I think those eyes were blue

Well now you end one love then onto another never thinkin' back at the past one
Never stop to think oh brother that the next one gonna be just like the last one
I once knew a woman listen while I tell you my story
She had a heart like the world her lips like a morning glory yeah
Well I knew at last I met my fate and I'm bound to settle down
Hey I wonder if she's still in town

Yeah I once knew a woman and listen while I tell you some more boys
Hey come to think of it I think I told bout her before boys

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I Call That True Love

You gotta wake up every mornin', tip toe in the
kitchen cook me great T-bone steak
Serve it to me in bed go down the street and hustle
bring me back all the money you make
You gotta rub my body with sweet scented oil,
cool me with a 'lectric fan
Run to the church fall down on your knees say 'Lord
I wanna thank you for that man'
And I'll call that true love, true and sweet
That ain't the kind of love I'm gettin
but baby that's the kind of love I need
I wanna come home every evenin' to a great big meal
of wine and roasted pheasant
Say to me 'Shel this is Susy, this is Nell, I brought 'em
both home to you for a present'
Cops bust in and find my stash, you gotta tell 'em
it belongs to you
And when you're sittin' in slam tell all the other
chickies when they get out
They should look me up too

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