Hippo's Hope
There once was a hippo who wanted to fly --
Fly-hi-dee, try-hi-dee, my-hi-dee-ho.
So he sewed him some wings that could flap through the sky --
Sky-hi-dee, fly-hi-dee, why-hi-dee-go.
He climbed to the top of a mountain of snow --
Snow-hi-dee, slow-hi-dee, oh-hi-dee-hoo.
With the clouds high above and the sea down below --
Where-hi-dee, there-hi-dee, scare-hi-dee-boo.
(Happy ending)
And he flipped and he flapped and he bellowed so loud --
Now-hi-dee, loud-hi-dee, proud-hi-dee-poop.
And he sailed like an eagle, off into the clouds --
High-hi-dee, fly-hi-dee, bye-hi-dee-boop.
(Unhappy ending)
And he leaped like a frog and he fell like a stone --
Stone-hi-dee, lone-hi-dee, own-hi-dee-flop.
And he crashed and he drowned and broke all his bones --
Bones-hi-dee, moans-hi-dee, groans-hi-dee-glop.
(Chicken ending)
He looked up at the sky and looked down at the sea --
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poem by Sheldon Allan Silverstein
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Everybody's Makin' It Big But Me
Elvis he's a hero he's a superstar
And I hear that Paul McCartney drives a Rolls Royse car
And Dylan sings for millions
And I just sing for free
Oh everybody's makin' it big but me
Oh, everybody's makin' it big but me
Everybody's makin' it big but me
Neil Diamond sings for diamonds
And here's ole rhinestone me
Oh everybody's makin' it big but me
Well I hear that Alice Cooper's got a foxy chick
To wipe off his snake, keep him rich
And Elton John's got two fine ladies
And Doctor John's got three
And I'm still seein' them same old sleezoes
That I used to see
Oh, everybody's makin' it big but me
Everybody's makin' it big but me
I've got charisma
And personality
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poem by Sheldon Allan Silverstein
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Polly In A Porny
Haha I kissed Polly goodnight haha as we stood at her front door
Now she's quite a proper lady so I didn't ask for anything more
But haha I was feeling oh so groovie that I went down to the movie
And I sat down and guess just what I saw
I saw Polly in a porny down at the dirty flicks
I saw Polly in a porny I didn't know she knew them tricks
What I seen nearly struck me blind I never knew she was the artically inclined
I saw Polly in a porny with a pony and I've nearly blowed my mind
Was she gallopin' (no no no) oh was she trottin' (no no no)
Oh was she riding across the country with some tall dark handsome person
Oh was she wearin' her cowboy hat haha well not exactly that
But at least I recall she had her spurs on
I love ol' Polly in a porny I keep on going back
Yeah in the very last row I'm singin' low with my coat bouncin' in my lap ooh
I spend each dime I can afford I swear she's gonna win an academy award
I saw Polly in a porny with a pony and the pony seemed a little bored
Ooh oh ride Polly ride slide Polly slide
poem by Sheldon Allan Silverstein
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Show It At The Beach
Oh they won't let us show it at the beach no they won't let us show it at the beach
They think we're gonna grab it if it gets within our reach
And they won't let us show it at the beach
But you can show it in your parlor to most anyone you choose
You can show it at a party with your second shot of booze
You can show it on the corner wearin' overcoat and shoes
But they won't let us show it at the beach
No they won't let us show it at the beach friends
Ah they won't us show it at the beach
Oh they're sure we're gonna grab it if it gets within our reach
So they won't let us show it at the beach
But you can show it in the movies on the cineramic screen
You can show it in the most sophisticated magazine
You can show it while you're bouncing on the high school trampoline
But they won't let us show it at the beach
But if you've got a gun it's legal to display it on your hip
You can show your butcher knives to any interested kid
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poem by Sheldon Allan Silverstein
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Plastic
Oh a little bitty termite you know he come knockin' knockin' on my front door
Well he walked right in sat right down started chewin' on the kitchen floor
You know he chewed out the walls and the ceilings and the halls Lord knows he tried
But he kept gettin' thinner and he never got no dinner and finally he sat up and cried
He said it's plastic yeah he said it's plastic
Well you know it ain't no wood and it can't do me no good
Because it's plastic he said it's plastic
You know that everything's gonna be plastic by and by
Yeah an early one day in the month of May I went down to the beach
You know there were beauties and cuties in little bathin' suities
And all of them within my reach
Then a 38-24-36 miss just happened to be passin' my way
I said please don't think I'm nervy but you look so very curvy
Please tell me how you got that way
She said it's plastic she said it's just plastic
She said it's pretty as can be but you know that it ain't me
Because it's plastic she said it's plastic everything's gonna be plastic by and by
poem by Sheldon Allan Silverstein
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She’s My Ever Lovin’ Machine
Hey boys you know once I was took in by a girl with a twinkly eye
And the first time that I wasn't lookin' she run off with a handsomer guy oh my
But I'm an ingenious feller yeah as soon as my brain got uncurled
I tiptoed right down to my cellar and I built a mechanical girl
Oh her arms are iron her legs are steel her hips are on wires attached to a wheel
And her spine is a coil that I now and then oil she's my ever-lovin' machine
She has no trouble making her mind up for I did not give her a mind
And her heart is a clock that I wind up so I know that she'll love me in time
Oh she never complains when I stay out all night she never complains I'm not rich
And each time I want her to cuddle me tight I simply turn on her switch
Oh her arms are iron...
My love is completely electric and she gives me a shock with each hug
And when the romance gets too hectic I simply pull out the plug
Oh she always did what she was supposed ter right up to this evening but then
She had an affair with the toaster and they ran off and left me again
poem by Sheldon Allan Silverstein
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Little Abigail and the Beautiful Pony
There was a girl named Abigail
Who was taking a drive
Through the country
With her parents
When she spied a beautiful sad-eyed
Grey and white pony.
And next to it was a sign
That said,
FOR SALE—CHEAP.
“Oh,” said Abigail,
“May I have that pony?
May I please?”
And her parents said,
“No you may not.”
And Abigail said,
“But I MUST have that pony.”
And her parents said,
“Well, you can have a nice butter pecan
Ice cream cone when we get home.”
And Abigail said,
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poem by Sheldon Allan Silverstein
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Cloudy Sky
The Moon she is a pretty girl who lives up in the stars
And that old cloud he's a great old man who loves her from afar
He loves her from afar
When Lady Moon smiles down on him ol' Cloud is all a-wonder
So he starts to sing to her and that's what makes the thunder
Can't ya listen baby that's what makes the thunder
Love is just a cloudy sky as far as I can see
And that ol' cloud up in the sky he got much chance in love as me
And some dry nights she won't come out when she hears him callin'
The tears come streamin' on down his cheeks and that's the rain a fallin'
Don't ya feel it baby hat's the rain a fallin'
Love is just a cloudy sky as far as I can see
And that ol' cloud up in the sky's got as much a chance in love as me
And when the night starts to gettin' light and he can see her goin'
He throws a kiss across the sky and that's the wind a blowin',
Can't ya feel it honey that's the wind a blowin'
Oh love is just a cloudy sky as far as I can see
And that ol' cloud up in the sky he's got as much a chance as me
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poem by Sheldon Allan Silverstein
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The Hunter
I have fought against the poodle with his gory, deadly paws;
I have faced the fearsome kitten, wild and bony,
And somehow I've evaded the enormous chomping jaws
Of the frighteningly ferocious Shetland pony.
My triumph o'er the rabbit is now sung throughout the land,
And men still speak in whispers of the day
When, attacked by twelve mosquitoes, with my one unwounded hand,
I killed nine of them and dove the rest away.
I have faced the housefly in his lair, I have stalked the ladybug
And the caterpillar, grim and fierce and hairy;
That trophy there is bumblebee, and this, my favourite rug,
Has been fashioned from the hide of a canary.
I have dove into the ocean to do combat with a shrimp,
I have dared the hen to come on out and fight;
I have battled with the butterfly (that's why I have this limp),
And I slew a monstrous grubworm just last night.
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poem by Sheldon Allan Silverstein
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Ugliest Man In Town
Handsome guys get girls that are pretty
Other guys make it cause they're clever and witty
But the only love I ever got I got out of pity cause I'm the ugliest man in town
Yeah I drive down the street in a Roys Rolls car
Use hundred dollar bills when I light my cigar
But you know folks that really don't get you very far
When you're the ugliest man in town
There was a note on the doorstep where I was found
Is said this poor child weighs eleven pounds
So bring him up healthy and welthy and sound
Keep his back to the light don't let him turn around
Yeah all you women you're heartless and cold all you want is my silver and gold
Don't you know I've got a beautiful soul though I'm the ugliest man in town
Yeah I'm so ugly I gotta shave in the dark
The kids start to cry when I walk through the park
The clock stop tickin' and dogs start to bark whenever I come around
Oh oh oh I walk down the street the girls all hiss me
If I died tomorrow not one of them would miss me
Only reason they ball me is they can't stand to kiss me
I'm the ugliest man in town oh yeah the ugliest man in town
poem by Sheldon Allan Silverstein
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