I was lonely driving here tonight so I hugged the road.

quote by Jay London
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My girlfriend has crabs, I bought her fishnet stockings.

quote by Jay London
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I went to a urologist - he told me I could go at any time.

quote by Jay London
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I'm on performance enhancing drugs, so I may cause drowsiness.

quote by Jay London
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I saw a sign it said left lane closed so I went someplace else.

quote by Jay London
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I went out with a promiscuous impressionist - she did everybody.

quote by Jay London
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It all started when my dog began getting free roll over minutes.

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A guy gave me a job at an information booth - no questions asked.

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My boss told me to get my butt in gear. I told him I was shiftless.

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My father would take me to the playground, and put me on mood swings.

quote by Jay London
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