When I was born I owed twelve dollars.

quote by George S. Kaufman
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Satire is what closes on Saturday night.

quote by George S. Kaufman
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I like terra firma; the more firma, the less terra.

quote by George S. Kaufman
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I understand your new play is full of single entendres.

quote by George S. Kaufman
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Epitaph for a dead waiter - God finally caught his eye.

quote by George S. Kaufman
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Office hours are from 12 to 1 with an hour off for lunch.

quote by George S. Kaufman
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At dramatic rehearsals, the only author that's better than an absent one is a dead one.

quote by George S. Kaufman
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The kind of doctor I want is one who when he's not examining me is home studying medicine.

quote by George S. Kaufman
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When I invite a woman to dinner, I expect her to look at my face. That's the price she has to pay.

quote by George S. Kaufman
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