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Scott Adams

One way to compensate for a tiny brain is to pretend to be dead.

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I respectfully decline the invitation to join your hallucination.

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We expect others to act rationally even though we are irrational.

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No matter how smart you are, you spend most of your day being an idiot.

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No matter how smart you are, you spend much of your day being an idiot.

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We must develop knowledge optimization initiatives to leverage our key learnings.

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Creativity is allowing yourself to make mistakes. Art is knowing which ones to keep.

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Consultants have credibility because they are not dumb enough to work at your company.

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Free will is an illusion. People always choose the perceived path of greatest pleasure.

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If you have any trouble sounding condescending, find a Unix user to show you how it's done.

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