Life
life can seem like a challenge which it is, but reality can sometimes change its being.
what i am trying to mean is that it may seem deam but u see reality cansomtimes lie to save its being, which, which means u truly suluwhat i seem to mean...
what i seem to mean truly never to be deep, but life surely sucks wish my life would have been bitten by a shark but still a live, my whispers never got heard but blood never got shooooook, my mind never got shooooook, taken but never returned it still gets me....
how will i ever survive, live to tell no more lies, intetwine with my beautiful mind regardless still not but will i ever recover to be fine as alchoholic as i am, , , ,
myind dreams while i try to sleep, dreams awaken me deeper than u should , i wake up sweating, shivering and hardly slept would u be, still recollect my seff @ times but i fail to see whatseally mine...
so lfe will either treat u kind or leave u behind... its up to u.....! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! !
poem by Thato Maluleka
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Life Is...........? ? ? ? ? ?
life can seem like a challenge which it is, but reality can sometimes change its being.
what i am trying to mean is that it may seem deam but u see reality cansomtimes lie to save its being, which, which means u truly suluwhat i seem to mean...
what i seem to mean truly never to be deep, but life surely sucks wish my life would have been bitten by a shark but still a live, my whispers never got heard but blood never got shooooook, my mind never got shooooook, taken but never returned it still gets me....
how will i ever survive, live to tell no more lies, intetwine with my beautiful mind regardless still not but will i ever recover to be fine as alchoholic as i am, , , ,
myind dreams while i try to sleep, dreams awaken me deeper than u should , i wake up sweating, shivering and hardly slept would u be, still recollect my seff @ times but i fail to see whatseally mine...
so lfe will either treat u kind or leave u behind... its up to u.....! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! ! !
poem by Thato Maluleka
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If only I
If only I could simplify love you would meet the requirements you see, they would be engraved from deep within the soil from above, and then we could fly above the ever blue skies like a white dove…
And as sunshine dazes catch me awake-Sleeping, day dreaming, holding on to summertime grooves as soft as the blues I’ll fly loose. And as you kindly harass the dance floor caress the whole floor, swift across the room effortless I’m speechless, almost motionless.
Oh no she flows like rhymes and punch lines in one line she’s so fine, fine-tuned she blows my mind…
If only I could simplify love, you have already met my requirements you see, your love is spotless, dirt has never once been on the surface you walk on, you are timeless, mine nevertheless.
We should nurture our nest to the finest, ‘cause lest we nurture its being it will die indeed a tragic passing never seen, heard of, or have been.
I have always seen you in me. And if time grants us a wish I guarantee we will forever be, be you and me.
poem by Thato Maluleka
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Monday to friday blues
Feelings of despair blind those that already see in colors black and white, eyes a gift in yours and my life. Life an experience sometimes like Hard hitting beats and many a time like subtle melodies, at a time when memories existed literally.
But now exists figuratively like fantasies, dreams never to become reality, a thing of the future it will never be, cuz experience has taught me many of life’s cruel lessons you see.
I go to war with my thoughts constantly on a daily bases trying to fight these demons that govern my whole being it takes me places, places where only darkness exists,20 thousand feet underneath please, I say please, but still I seem never to be at ease.
wake me up from this dream, Wake me, so I can peacefully be, be like any other human being, dream of better things, inhale the scent that covers the winds, gaze at trees swaying as thought they were speaking to me saying…. Hang in there your day is coming, coming soon, on a half moon, I’ll send you clues, forget about those Monday to Friday blues, let’s call it truce, so you, you my dearest can become, become a better you….
poem by Thato Maluleka
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Pain
There seems to be spaces that couldn't can't be filled, I feel empty almost unreal, I feel I am no longer a human being, just a skeleton amongst living beings.
Where did I go wrong, when did I seemingly start to lose that smile, did I walk down the wrong road, am I a lost soul, have I lost control.
U know all I seem to do is fake smile, pretend to be fine, laugh even as if I am having fun, but slowly inside I die, will I ever be fine.
If I may ask am I even myself at this time, is this pain gonna take a while some indefinite time.
How do I begin to define this sad pain, this permanent stain, this heart piercing engraved pain?
I miss being in love and in the same breath loath it as well; I have come to a point where I don't care, I can't spare/neither prepare to love again.
I just can't just can't anymore give this already broken heart to anyone gain.
It's just amazing how it just blossoms like a sweet scented rose at the start, and just like that collapses almost harshly deliberately stomped upon, a once alive rose (Love) u chose. Left to die a silent death, out of breath, a love now coming to an end.
But in the end only God knows what plans he has for the human race.
poem by Thato Maluleka
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Hope Of Seeing You Again
I can’t help it if you got me twisted, tripping, slipping even missing you. Still can’t imagine thinking of how one day could stay with me for so long because of you, damn how can I even pretend ‘cause I know it’s true, I think I’m still in love with you.
I know I won’t see you again, but am I going to handle this pain, ‘cause I’ll remember you when it rains, when the sun shines, every day.
You are permanently engraved on my brain, you are what I say a permanent stain. You flow through my veins rushing to gain first place, I mean we even got to first base.
My pulse stops when you halt pause, when you halt pause strike a pose try to impose a lonely soul, a troubled bro, a man whose heart you stole and then broke.
I’m broke I have no more faith to buy love I’m stoned, stoned from consuming depression, smoking all of my passion, then throwing up compassion, ‘cause I have disowned love’s affection, damn how I loathe warm-affection.
It got me again and this time didn’t even try to explain why it couldn’t stay…
Still I hope we meet again, somewhere where u and I stand a chance, no more games. A moment where circumstances have changed, where you and I stand a chance, ‘Cause yours is a face I won’t forget
poem by Thato Maluleka
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Broken Pieces Of Me
U know it's funny, and the funny hahahaha OMG die hulle lot kinda thing, is that tried-I tried and finally I am tired, exhaustion has finally given in surrendered, arms up, you know that I give up kinda thing, that I-I can finally say love aint for real.
I have come to a conclusion, a I kinda now know now typa thing, that the only love that will ever exist is the love that God and my Blood family gives, a love I will eternally receive with open arms-heart and soul.
You know my only goal, only hope was to fall in love, and I thought I was (referring to my-my recent attempt) I mean. U sees she came indeed sweet, making me feel alive and needed indeed, valued finally human, a man.
I kid you not believe you me I kid you not, I harth not never in my life had the worst relationship with another human as this, a ship that knowingly seeing sink in front of my naked eyes, yes it slowly sinked but in greater speeds u see, cause its only been a coupla weeks.
So ya I have exhausted my love, I have tried so hard, only to be met by failed attempts, and parts of memories I would love to forget, so again I say please forgive me for not believing in that intimate kind of love I am done with this heartbreaking love, this I wish I never met you kinda love, this how I.... kinda love.
So I think it's about that time I gave my heart a break, for heavens sake.
poem by Thato Maluleka
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Dreams of being with or without you
I want to find you cause you found me alone, Isolated from the world of love. Disconnected from an entire network of hope to love I long to hold love.
But you see I’m scared to get close to your warmth, so bear with my faults as I crawl to near your soul, cry showers of pain as I regret the choice that will unfold when I finally lose hope.
I carry on but can’t cope I sit around and mope thinking of experimenting with coke- blaze dope to cope, get crazy as I continue to lose hope… Damn I lost hope. Stashed her in a place of lost control I can’t onthou…
Still slowly in the mist of my silent sleep, almost like I was mocking death as I peacefully rest with no stress, you resurfaced, identity changed, a love I can finally embrace a love I can’t escape…
Was hope all along within my soul? Did I not hear the truth you spoke? Was I so blind as to not realize, you by my side?
But ever blessed… There are no more dreams of coke just dreams of hope, I can cope.
Cause’ finally after a lifetime of pain, I take no more strain, my sins have been washed away by the rain, I take no more strain, I’m no longer in pain, I can love again.
You showed me the way, I’m here to stay. I’ll be free flowing in this freeway of minimal pain, watching dark clouds gather peaceful rain, as I inhale hope from deep within the roots of the AFRICAN SOIL; I will no longer boil from hatred, as I will be a man of patience…
By: thato Maluleka
poem by Thato Maluleka
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Depression is a state of mind
Depression is a state of mind, but I have consumed so much it is no longer a state of mind but reality in my mind.
I try to escape but there is no place for me to escape, I am being stalked by unbearable thoughts of my faults on my way to an unknown walk.
Consistency of unpredictability springs jumps to unreachable heights to place me at this misery, reality hits hard kills me tears me apart, disruption of life’s little parts of life.
My heart pounds in uncontrollable speeds I am in need of these, these pain consuming pills that kills freely, I’m in need to feel free indeed. But feeling free is neither for me nor we you see.
The disturbing features I produce that govern my whole being is not meant to be seen by the naked eye oh but my It will be introduced, soon.
My whole life Is made out of disappointments, I’m never in that moment, I lose courage to carry on I’m mentally switched off, the lights are turned off. I go off soon before I recall what is to be told, I’m cold, I talk slow to grasp the flow of my words, my utterance is off balance, my whole heart is abandoned.
I’m not human, my way of living is accurately out of character, and I smile for show so people won’t know what goes on behind those closed doors of lost hope, it’s all wrong.
I pray that one day I shall awake from this mind consuming depression state of mind truly unkind, cause my life’s extensions are non functional, I am in fear of going mental…
Creativity is crucial, my thoughts brutal, my life dysfunctional, Hope Seasonal, holding on not optional…
poem by Thato Maluleka
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We Built
- We build a wall never to fall cause we wanted to be alone.
- We build a love so strong never to be torn or ripped apart cause we knew it wasn’t wrong.
- We build a friendship with a solid foundation, with solid rocks, in a ship that never sinks but floats cause we knew it would stand forever its course.
- We build a wall never to collapse, crumble or fall cause all we wanted was to be alone.
- We build a love so strong and bold never to be torn, ripped apart, a sworn love, cause we knew it wasn’t wrong.
- We build a friendship with a solid foundation based on honesty and trust, built with solid rocks, in a heavenly ship that never sinks but floats as though you’re walking on air cause we knew it would stand forever and remain here.
And as I gaze at the clouds that forms encrypted scriptures of our blossoming love, I sigh with relief as I now believe in a love everlasting, my mind spins as dizziness settles in, I’m in for a surprise and then you descended from the skies.
Oh I smile get confused for a while, I can’t believe my naked eyes, you a friend of mine now soon to be a lover of mine, you caught me by surprise, it was you that always ignited my heart filled it up with desire, you that I dreamt of at night, Still your face was unclear for a while, yes I now remember that smile and how could I forget those eyes I get lost in every time.
Then as you touched the ground with your naked feet you reached for me, mesmerized I could hardly speak-move yet still YOU-YOU moved, moved closer how could a heart beat be so loud it deafened the crowd, then you spoke out loud but in a foreign tongue I couldn’t make out, then slowly as though you were not moving kissed me in a way I could hardly make out as though you spoke while we kissed.
It was you that always ignited my heart, you a friend of mine, soon to be a lover of all time.
poem by Thato Maluleka
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