Behind invisible bars

Take me everything is becoming stronger than me…
Take me before they find out or they’ll destroy me…

Take me to a place were id be able to surrender…
Take me and enlighten my spirit so tender…

Take me some where I wouldn’t be watched…
Take me where I can be as load as I want without being hushed...

Take me where I would be loved for me…
Take me away from every scary memory…

Take me when ever as long as you take me now…
Take me where ever I won't even ask you how…

Take me to a better hell one with less heat…
Take me am no longer strong enough to compete

Take me and from this prison release me…
Take me and from this life set me free…

poem by Ayesha Sartawi
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Craving your sight

I gently close my eyes its darkness I see
I try to search for you in every memory

I feel your fingers all over my hair
I see beauty among me I silently stare

I remember that warmth of love we shared
I am reminded of the satisfaction that occurred

I know deep down I long your touch
I know for a fact that I miss you too much

I cant bear it anymore I need your existence
I can resist anything but your distance

I am stronger than everything but when it comes to you
I am week I am vulnerable knowing there is nothing I can do

it is only you I want and only you I fancy
it is you invading my life with mystical ecstasy

[...] Read more

poem by Ayesha Sartawi
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Buried rose

Love is like a red dark rose
at the beginning it blossoms and grows
day after day something goes wrong
no matter how much that rose seems strong
then it shrivels from all the lies
gives up and wilts then dies

you were its hope you were its water
you were its sun you were its winter
you where the air it breaths
you were its green immortal leaves

I am sorry I was its hidden thorn
I hurt you but it was the reason I was born
I loved you too much to hurt you anymore
that’s why I chose to walk out that door

you cant stop a bird from singing
you cant stop a bee from stinging
you were my bird and I was your bee

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poem by Ayesha Sartawi
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Healing Friendship

When the night has come
when the sun has gone

when the rippling river stops
when there are no more rain drops

When the mountain falls down
when you lose your crown

When there is a big black cloud
when the voices are too loud

When the bridge breaks through
when left only me and you

When its dark lacking light
when you're feeling a fright

When it becomes hard to survive
when you struggle to stay alive

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poem by Ayesha Sartawi
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My cage

my golden bars my home my cage
my immortality my isolated stage
My spiritual inspiration my comfort zone
my treasure, the only thing I come to own

I have watched and seen it all, through you
I’ve wasted and tasted every feeling that’s true
I’ve laughed I’ve felt ecstasy then it vanished away
I’ve grieved I’ve chocked then it ended one day

I’ve read many stories I’ve been visited by many of the suffering
I’ve seen many hurt people but with a smile still covering
I had a choice I could of even have chosen freedom
but why be released in this world, this devil’s kingdom

why be exposed why reveal my self to prejudice
why leave? Why live? Where life there no longer is
I’d rather last I’d rather grow I’d rather age
I’d rather live I’d rather die in my cage

poem by Ayesha Sartawi
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Abandoned heart

I haven’t been to my heart since you were last there
I haveng found the courage to since I had lost your care

But now its time to go back as its been too long
I think I am ready now but I am afraid to be wrong

I reluctantly enter through that narrow tunnel
over every mountain and cave on my camel

I hadn’t thought that this much would change
I feel like I barely recognise it, everything feels strange

spider webs, echoes and darkness
two chairs knocked over by emptiness

two cups of cofee with a little left
rapping paper on the floor, wait there is a gift

I hear our voices and I can hear us shouting and laughing
I see reflections of our crowns when we used to be queen and king

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poem by Ayesha Sartawi
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Rest in peace

Every time I want to end it all I hesitate then stop
I have tried a knife a gun but from my hand they all drop
Is it fear of death or love of life that ironically prevents me?
Is it the lack of strength or is it the bitterness of my enemy

The darkness of my shadow is a reflection of within
forgetting is my greatest gift while regretting is my sin
I love a few people and I am faithful to death
but I also hate many and I would take their last breath

don't come near me don't touch me don't even wipe my venom tears
do not ask and I will not answer nowadays even walls have ears
I will live and i will lend you time, you will suffer from my generosity
we each have something special to brag about mine is animosity

I shall wait for my life reaper for it shall not harm my ease
I shall count the stars i dreamt of reaching as i rest in peace

poem by Ayesha Sartawi
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It Takes A Day To End

IT TAKES A DAY….

What do I tell my self when I am awakened by tomorrow morning's sun
what may I answer my abandoned pillow when it asks where he's gone

How do I explain what I myself can't understand
at times I think I am certain, and at times I don't know where I stand

Do I dare say he loved me? Can I bear say he didn’t?
I had night mares that he'd leave me but my heart dreamt he wouldn’t

I can't forget the sentence he said before he left! ! !
I didn’t realize 'goodbye my friend' would leave me so bereft

He asked me to be a friend and expected an easy yes
I cant believe he actually wanted me to love him less

I said I needed not his friendship, it's his love I need
Then I stormed out like never before while fighting to breath

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poem by Ayesha Sartawi
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Angels belong to the skies

I am not an angel and I never claimed to be one
I look for shelter in the rain and I burn in the sun

It is not a hard equation, it is time for you to decide
Love or leave me but I am tired from the times I have tried

I am a human with proud mistakes, not the angel you want me to be.
I am who and what I am, not the angel you're looking for in me.

Say the words you want to say, say them now don't wait a while
I tell myself I love you not, but I now I am living in denial

I can see in your eyes ambiguity and I know the longing look in mine
my heart is losing its pace and its beats are rushing helplessly through time

I am not an angel, for when I try to fly; my wings fall to the ground
and the gravity pulls down my tears and I have fears from screaming sounds

Every time I try to change for you I lose a piece of my soul,
every time you leave me behind I lose myself as a whole.

poem by Ayesha Sartawi
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Perfect night

Rock my chair comfort me cosy I am on a winters night
Hand me my spiritual cup of fate its love from first sight

Melton my frozen heart let the warmth of love provide ecstasy
idolize me and I’ll worship you let us live a sacred fantasy

Switch off any source of heat ours is far more stronger
drew the curtains shut the door embrace me I cant wait longer

Lay beside me as I crave your arms to be rapped around mine
create around us cherished borders allow no one to cross the line

Act with no previous planning spontaneous we shall be from now on
watch our hearts glow as red Christmas its our love we depend on

Play your fingers through my hair, drive me to sleep with that symphony
I will rest my head upon your chest I’ll hear your heart beat in harmony

Love me as I love you for we shall be a couple that cant be split
realise and be sure that we will always be a match you cant forget

poem by Ayesha Sartawi
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