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Nic Hillen

No Hope

So much pressure in this life of mine
I cry at times
This pain has left my body aching
Feel forsaken out of loss for inspiration
I prepare for the worst, hope is out of bounds
I never believe in silver line clouds
Always pessimistic, don't try chasing any dreams
Numb my memory of all the evil that I've seen
Got no outlet to release my pain inside
I feel death creeping closely by my side
But my only fear of death is reincarnation
In this cold world head towards elimination
In a place full of war, corruption and nuclear weapons
There has to be a better place than this in heaven

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My Mum

As the fulgurate moonlight shines
Distant skies recede
God had sent a sacred angel
To love and care for me
This angel is my mum
Inspiration is were she lies
A kind and generous heart
such warm and caring eyes
Putting others before herself
She always goes that extra mile
To cheer you up
Or make you smile

Worked her fingers to the bone
A perfect mother
You made our house a home
All the times ive let you down
Your forgiveness put me at ease
Most would just give up
My mum would still believe

[...] Read more

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Change

She had a heart so pure, a love so great
I can only explain her as my soul mate
A special woman, she would make a perfect wife
But the path I took led to a different life

My dealing ways went from bad to worse
For the last few years its being a curse
Acting reckless and riding it tough
If truth be known ive had enough

I trust in the lord, waiting for a sign
Guide me away from this life of crime
How many times am I going to fail
Slip up once and im straight back in jail

So as I prepare for another try
I life in jail for what and why
As the cycle hardly breaks
Got to do right after all the mistakes

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Calling GOD (No Answer)

Tired and stressed, my body aches
Bitter and cold from past mistakes
Tears are rolling down my cheek
Our saviour Jesus I long to meet
My mind was content when he was close
But now his distant my minds exposed
Im falling apart and feeling lost
My soul was sold but at no cost
Satan's slave is what ive become
Drugs ease my pain till my brain is numb

My minds being poisoned in a wordly way
Depraved and enticed to weak to pray,
before I lost faith I cherished his every word
Now, Lost in the darkness, I let my sights get blurred
The cost to pay for giving into temptation
I life of sin with no salvation.

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Why?

As im getting older, my hearts getting colder
I cant budge the weight off my shoulder
My problems unite, new one's arise
These washed up memories bought by the tide
No one was there when I needed them the most
Nothing by phone or even by post
Tears have fallen like you wouldn't believe
Parts of me missing that ill never receive
Im itching forward, but my shoulders ache
But there is only me to blame for my messed up state
Why cant I get these thoughts out of my mind
Suicide is the answer if God don't respond in time
I hold a chest full of pain till the day that I die
Before my last gasp, ill cry out why.

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Autumn

The changing cycle of a seasonal swap
Farmers harvest there final crop
The warm light evenings slowly drift away
Vibrant colours perform a magical display
The winds cuts deep like razor wire
Leaves dance around like flames on fire
Cooler air draws in from the east
Animals forage for a needed snack
In preparation for long winters nap
The icy artic air starting to creep
Surviving leaves admit defeat
Emerald leaves carpet the ground
and vibrant textures yellow and brown
A flawless picture an inspiring view
Crispy mornings brings dancing dew
The naked trees stand in prevail
Will soon be part of a winters tale
The lake forms a blanket of icy glass
As autumn days will merely pass

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Struggle

I wake up to loss of hope
Like a knife put to my throat
Benefits and child support
Sick of saying it aint my fault
Turn to crime to get us through
that's not what fathers suppose to do
But il make sure my son can eat
Tuck him in at night to sleep
don't want my mum to look in shame
So I'm praying when will it change

I need god to feel much closer
lift this weight off my shoulder
But I'm getting tired of waiting
Need some kind of stimulation
My ambition got put to rest
Out of greed for that treasure chest
I find it hard to keep it real
All I do is gamble and deal
Committing these sins of Satan

[...] Read more

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Rich and Poor

Money brings problems to the wealthy and the poor
Money causes conflict that often leads to war
Money ruins families that can barley afford to eat
Working every night and day just to make ends meet
Money is still desired how ever great your wealth
Power and greed take control and corrupt your inner self
Needed for survival across the world in every place
Soon as you leave school get set to join the paper chase
Money is the path to deception, cheating and enmity
So watch that your arrogance wont make hell your final destiny
To believe your better or more important than any body else
Is an major fault in any man that is bought on by wealth
Money separates the rich and the poor
But when your times up money is no more

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My Baby Boy

So helpless and fragile a heart so pure
Innocent to a world that they are unsure
When he was born all pain went away
Replaced with love from the magical day

His milky soft skin his big deep blue eyes
Gods gift from heaven bought down from the skies
I love the way you laugh when I sing to you
The noise your bum makes little stinky roo
You get frustrated trying so hard to speak
By bouncing continuous and kicking his feet
I love so strong right from the start
You stole my breath and embrace my heart
you love going to play especially to swim
you kick your legs franticly whilst wearing a grin
Sometimes I think this cant be real
They joy and happiness you make me feel
A feeling so strong a heart so pure
My love for you is evermore

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Beauty on a Winters Night

On a crispy winters night
hazy mist obstructs my sight
The biting frost tingles my toes
A scent of sweet perfume was lingering close
Gentle footsteps I began to hear
The thickened mist started to clear
Then like an angel sent down from heaven
Her radiance already began to beckon
As she got closer I could only describe
The most beautiful image to meet my eye
Glittering lips that tint with glow
A fair complexion as white as snow
A radiant shine her warm rosy cheeks
My heart starts pounding as our eyes meet
Caring bright eyes full emotion
Starry and blue as deep as the ocean
Silky hair, sculptured cheek bone
She walked with a style all of her own
A desirable beauty a treasured sight
That stole my heart and walked into the night

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