That's my only goal. Surround myself with funny people, and make sure everyone has a good time and works hard.

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To me, comedy is a great occupation because I don't really worry that much about what other people think of me.

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Because I have a girlfriend, I try and take the straight and narrow path, which is good because it prevents VD.

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When someone comes along and expresses him or herself as freely as they think, people flock to it. They enjoy it.

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I really never had any ambitions to be a standup comic. I was talked into it by guys that I used to work out with.

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Being a celebrity or anything else where you're really ambitious, it's really a game to see how successful you can get.

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The only time I commit to conspiracy theories is when something way retarded happens. Like Lee Harvey Oswald acting alone.

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After this whole acting thing is over and done, you eventually have to be human. Some people are never human. It's very weird.

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Comedy is really not like any other art form in that it's very specialized and varied in it's content, but generic in it's title.

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It's painful for me to watch someone who isn't funny. It's horrifying to sit in the back and watch some guy who just totally sucks.

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