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W.C. Fields

If there's a will, prosperity can't be far behind.

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Start every day with a smile and get it over with.

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A thing worth having is a thing worth cheating for.

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I'm free of all prejudices. I hate everyone equally.

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I am free of all prejudice. I hate everyone equally.

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The best cure for insomnia is to get a lot of sleep.

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Last week, I went to Philadelphia, but it was closed.

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It ain't what they call you, it's what you answer to.

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I am free of all prejudices. I hate every one equally.

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Hell, I never vote for anybody, I always vote against.

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