My Friend

I've been thinking
About you
About me
About the Us
That is Us
And
About the us
That isn't
About what we may wish
About what can be
About what can't be

I do my best to
Maintain my self
Do my best to hide
How I really feel

I have to say
Friend of mine
You sure don't make it easy on me

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poem by Rabia Minhas
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And then, you Weren't

The day you died
I did not cry
I didn't hide the pain
I didn't run from the numbness.
I sat there
As something broke
Something fundamental inside me
Stopped breathing
As you took your last breath.
It was as if the earth stopped spinning
Suddenly
And I flew off and hit my head
On a blunt object.
It was that dulling pain that burns..
So hot that it consumes your being...
A pile of ember, my flesh..
I lay there
Weightless..like charcoal after the last bit of heart has burned and no longer lights
Waiting
To be carried away

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poem by Rabia Minhas
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Ahhh Life

It's strange I have to say,
Sometimes...
When I stop and look,
Really look at myself and who I've become...
I don't think
If I saw the old me, somewhere on the street
She'd recognize herself;
This Me, I've become.
Don't get me wrong,
By no means do I regret the decisions I've made...
They were best for their time.
But,
Sometimes I stop and wonder...
What would have happened
If we'd gone through with our plans?
If we would have gotten married,
Had the kids we'd talked about.
If things hadn't
Ended
So

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poem by Rabia Minhas
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Indus

The Indus valley has born forth a child,

So it was pronounced

When my mother was born.

Her hair is like liquid India ink.

Her eyes are black opals.

She is a tigress,

And a peacock.

She was an enchantress from birth.

Born from Kings

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poem by Rabia Minhas
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Conversation with God

Dear God,
If I wrote you a letter and mailed it,
Would that help?
Would you understand me better then?
If I light it on fire
Will the smoke not only carry the words but their intent on it's billowing wings?
Will they coil themselves into your ears,
Will you finally hear me then?
I've been screaming for years
I've whispered some
I've cried a deluge of tears.
I've become a raving mad lunatic
I've hurled myself against the iron bars
Of the cage you've put me in.
Come visit
See my tear stained face.
Help me understand how we've created the
Me
I've become.
Do I ask for too much?

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poem by Rabia Minhas
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Just a Thought

You only have one life.
Set yourself freeHere,
I am here.
I stand before you to judge me,
Mock me if you must
Because it makes you feel better
About yourself.
Understand me.
You can't.
You can't get a glimpse of me through these
Words
Alone.
Is what I choose to be, or, rather
Apart from you.
I don't want you to infect me with our
Particular brand of insanity.
I don't want to be locked up,
Told where my place is in the world.
Who are you to set me in parameters?
You're simply afraid to break free of..

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poem by Rabia Minhas
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Love Letter to a Soldier

Blind men go to battle
Like blind mice running towards water,
Fighting for a cause.
What cause?
You're only told parts of the whole story.
The rest is shrouded in mystery.
It will cover you,
Like a gauzy funeral cloth,
You will be bound in
By your beliefs,
Based on your limited experience.
After all,
You never knew what was the reality of your enemy.
While waiting for bullets to tear into you,
A bomb to blow you to bits,
Did you ever wonder,
Soldier,
If war is worth your cause?
And,
What of the blood now staining your hands

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poem by Rabia Minhas
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You Can Never Go Home Again

Its been forty years or so
But the dreams still remain
And, in them, I enter happiness.
I race home from school
And burst through the gates.
Where
My father
As always
Awaits with an ever ready smile.
The sun shines behind me
And his crisp ironed shirt does not prevent him
From lifting me up in his arms.
My father does not fear wrinkles..
I speak
In my sleep, a foreign tongue
It bursts from my lips
Like an overripe mango.
And,
I awake, remembering...
I was there again.

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poem by Rabia Minhas
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Chasing a Dream

On a lovely spring day
When the air is still cool on the skin
And touches you
Like the forgotten tiny kisses of a lover long gone
And the sunshine is warming and bright
Like the radiance of his smile
Forever stamped in your memory

I run through cool, tall green grass
Chasing butterflies,
Like a carefree child that did the same
Many years past.

With the salt on your skin and
The dirt on your hands and feet.

Chasing butterflies
Happy and carefree.

On a clear crisp winter's night

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poem by Rabia Minhas
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This Life

As my body begins to turn against me
And I face the inevitable fate
That I too am flesh and bone
Impending death...
My thoughts turn to my childhood
The green dappled hills
The snow covered peaks
The lush valleys
Of a childhood in a place so far away...
My playing near a crisp clear stream
As the sun danced on my skin
Tasting melting snow
Laying in soft grass in an apple orchard
Watching the birds fly overhead
Inhaling sweet perfumed air
Looking at a team of ants busy in their day's work
Spotting a squirrel or two at play
Daydreaming
Making up adventures in my head
This life

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poem by Rabia Minhas
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