Loneliness
Adrenalin overflow and my last healthy meal
five days ago, caught in chemical imbalance
feeling as jittery and confused as a mentally
deranged patient, dreaming of the calm and
peace brought about by an even flow of joie
de vivre
Tired of electric surges of adrenaline that put
me on top of the world just to let me fall down
into Purgatory, interspersed with brief spells in
hell, not an enjoyable way to live life, up high I
am delighted, just to feel like death and des-
truction afterwards
From tomorrow it shall be bland vegetables
and fat-free meat dishes - I HATE the lack
of control over moods and feelings brought
about by my body's reaction to foodstuffs,
this keeps me chained to a desk job where
all excitement slowly dies
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poem by Margaret Alice Second
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Grave Distress
Throat burning, molten fire dripping,
winter extracting a high fee for the
desire to live, shrinking existence
to a small point of absolute
discomfort
This dreary darkness, every moment
slanted, almost falling over, pitchforking
emotion annihilating awareness of loving
presence, all sound empty of meaning, all
activity devoid of sense
Lost ability to find my way back, still on the
way down, must reach rock-bottom before the
tide can turn, doing nonsensical things acting as
iron posts in weaving my little story, I am trying
to manipulate
The narrative imperative, seeking a new perspective
on mundane activities, trying to find ways to enjoy
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poem by Margaret Alice Second
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An Avalanche of Words (Revised)
June easily explained my document, me being
an alien in a legal world, reading formulations
and provisos that had me falling down ice-cold
in fright; my brain left me in detention, buried
alive in an avalanche of terminology that kept
falling on my head
To my colleague this stuff is easily explained,
no guessing game - yet I cannot surface for air,
unfortunately I do not have her savoir faire and
cool mastery of benchmark idioms, my mind
cannot unbend and learn stratagems of legal
phrasing and make lists for future reference
Pain at back of my head informs my body it is
time to play dead, a limited vocabulary does
not allow me to decipher arcane language used
in Courts of Law, if only I could teach my brain
but it has been stubborn from the very start -
refusing to do my will
poem by Margaret Alice Second
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How The Dinosaurs Died (Revised)
How develop evergreen self-esteem when yesterday’s
regime – 2 kinds of rolls, fresh and warm– can be seen
in swollen eyelids and facial expression effect
‘Tis unfair to know all bread and dough is explicitly
forbidden, ‘tis so unfair it strengthens my theory the
dinosaurs’ extinction was also due to wheat allergy
Forced to subsist on grass and grain, they expired with
sinuses swollen, unseeing eyes, low blood sugar and
muscle weakness, all symptoms of food intolerance
It caused their universal demise; I shall not force my
surmise on science but until I die I shall be the only
one who intimately knows how the dinosaurs died!
�Evergreen self-esteem� � Coined by Terry Pratchett in
his new book �Snuff� [Lord Rust, p.62]
poem by Margaret Alice Second
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Collecting Memories
Want to cherish the laughter and joy of the
wonderful times spent with the kids taking
them to school, Tiaan reading Nicis essay
aloud with such funny comments, we were
in stitches, she claimed the king was on the
ceiling meaning he stood above his slaves
Tiaan claiming my aggressive driving causes
them to suffer epileptic attacks, that they are
emotionally scarred by the determined way I
stick to my guns when others try to cut us off
or appear right before me, happy banter and
mock sarcasm creating a warm atmosphere
I love the delighted laughter, magical moments
spent together, would like to record them in my
head to rejoice and relive whenever needed to
lighten dark times, saving the sunshine of warm
companionship for the lonely future, beautiful
memories to keep my dreams sweet
poem by Margaret Alice Second
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Dark Purple Cloud (Revised)
Charging the robot, waiting impatiently to
practice my Grand Prix skills - deriving
no real joy from overtaking a few listless
motorists - swerving around a big truck,
arrived at work amazingly enough in one
piece albeit wondering why it felt like I
was caught in a dark hole with no escape
Walked into the brightness outside - to
my shocked surprise the cash machine
turned into a troll and ate my card -
called the magic number immediately to
cancel gobbled-up credit - numbed in
shock returned to my work station so
traumatised, shared my distress with
soothing colleagues who,
On commiserating with my dilemma,
recommended horse liniment for the
lump on my leg - I am still wondering
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poem by Margaret Alice Second
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Wake a Spark
Once again wondered briefly why
my feelings had died, returned to
the translation on my desk ready
to be checked and remembered
endless research of nonsensical
terms for uncaring readers while
Earning idiosyncratic marks from
invigilators, freezes the emotion
that lived within me, living life as
the remains of the teeming sparks
of passionate feeling, then I smile
- little things always wake a spark
From time to time, nothing can keep
my spirit down eternally, the yoke
of death is just veneer that enables
me to carry out constrictive duties
while my soul is high, clear & free
and carries on a separate life
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poem by Margaret Alice Second
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Dreams In My Hands
Crisis solved, stuck glitter pencils to the
wall of the office, bought a supposedly
identical doll to the one standing next to
me already but she is not identical at all
Her colour is different, her mouth a little
nicer so she looks kinder and her dress
is white giving her a shine while the first
one looks sad in a plum-coloured dress
Also bought 3-D stickers of ships to set
my mind free and the symbolism works,
too beautiful to take out of the packet as
yet so anchored to the wall with a cross
Gone the feeling of oppression, gone the
anxiety of unfounded fear, also bought a
workman bag to carry my book - ‘Johnny
and the Dead' and my handbag and now
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poem by Margaret Alice Second
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Transitologists
Election in Tunisia without meeting the
most important criteria for successful
government and the highest good of
the nation-state:
Educating the leaders of Africa, how to
bring about separation between church
and state, how to provide for multi-ethnic
-religious, and -cultural peoples
Moving from Western-style democracy
- which always fails in Africa - towards
Federalism – studying Transitology to
change authoritarian regimes…
Searching for Transitologists: Contemporary Theories of Post...
faculty.wcas.northwestern.edu/~jlg562/ .../Gans-Morse-PSA.pdf
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poem by Margaret Alice Second
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Celebration Of Being
A thirteen-year old heroine complains
her mother suddenly seems just gross
and embarrassing; I realised everything
seemed embarrassing to me right from
the start of my life as if I was tainted with
the low EQ - emotional quotient - of an
adolescent and am still the same today
Embarrassment about my parents and
siblings never changed; should one try
to grow up emotionally - impossible, as
one youngster sings High school never
ends, we all still compete for the same
things and fight the same bullies; some
people are wise like my colleague Hanlie
But I remain caught up in the emotional
conundrums of the past and the only way
to move forward is to concentrate on my
partner and kids where fun and laughter
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poem by Margaret Alice Second
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