2010/02/22 Forgave
I managed a major faux pas today
blood-sugar stabilizing peanuts -
eating too much, suddenly swelling
in my head causing debilitating pain:
pain in my ears, pain in my ears, PAIN
PAIN, stopped working, clung to my chair
looked at pictures, looked at nothingness
Painkillers unable to stop the pain in my ears
I lost everything, every hope of completing my
document, every dream of writing something
uplifting or noble or both, all I knew was the pain,
the bitter taste of failure again, once more I could
not complete a translation, could not even recall
the sound or the feel of the dream
The only thing I retained, the assurance I found:
‘I’ll never leave you nor desert you’ - I could not
pin it to anyone, so I assigned it to the Lord of
the New Testament who declared it is all
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poem by Margaret Alice
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A Lovely Lavender Day
Purple, everything purple, purple
the colour I love, everything packaged
in purple – tile cleaner in a purple
container for lavender sweetness
Also power-cleaning cream for lavender-
fresh effects, the bottle appealing in a
soft purple hue, fabric conditioner in purple
too, accompanied by lavender promises
And my purple hot water bottle – I bought
Nici a purple fleece; a purple coverlet
on my bed, my favourite chocolate in a
purple wrapper
Purple is spiritual in the division of
seven chakra colours – red is earthed in
primitive desire, followed by orange, yellow,
green – the colour of love – and
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poem by Margaret Alice
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Crystal Butterfly
What made an author write a
lovely fantasy about a special
person called Anastasia Mor-
ningstar who turned naughty
children into frogs
But could not do the same to
the rational science teacher
because his wonderment at
nature’s glories made him
immune to the
Power of her magic; what made
her describe a transparent but-
terfly seen by the teacher as a
boy, a crystal beauty, that pre-
served him from
Completely rejecting the existence
of the inexplicable in Anastasia’s
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poem by Margaret Alice
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2010/07/26 Auric Light
An invisible string to thread my small crystal
beads, even Tiaan helping because I cannot
see to do it myself, it would take me a hundred
years at least to complete one string
I wanted to make many strings to represent my
vision of auric light shining out, but after an epic
struggle I gave up and upended the beads in
crystal glasses to enjoy the pristine shine
Without destroying my eyes, Tiaan commenting
‘After suffering for many years to string beads, I
found the solution, dumping beads everywhere’
and I laughed, Nici only shaking her head
While busy with her bead-making craft - I also love
the effect of beads in sea-shells, resembling coarse
salt but with a new shine, no more threading for me
I cannot see, it felt too much like torture
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poem by Margaret Alice
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2010/08/31 Book Of Secrets
Took Nici to a hairdresser to plan a hairstyle
for the ball, then visited a novelty shop and
found a fairy dairy in pink that recreated all
my auric dreams, a three-dimensional fairy
within a string of pearls, flowers, coloured
glitter, silver ink reflecting the light
Though the key is stuck without turning, it is
the prettiest fairy picture I have ever seen, I
shall lock up all my favourite poems in it, it
shall be my book of secrets, I shall treasure
it, a reminder of that beautiful dress I saw at
the dressmaker, fuelling dreams
I must find a way to take the dairy everywhere
I go on earth, I never want to be without this
enchantment again, I adore this dairy as I have
never adored anything before; bought coloured
notebooks in the past, but nothing like this, it is
glorious to be in possession of real magic
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poem by Margaret Alice
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I’ll Show You Enthusiasm (Rev) 6.26.2008
There is a new karaoke machine on the market,
you carry it with you and sing wherever you are,
I begged my colleagues to give one to me
should they ever plan gifts
June warned me not to bring one to Kingsley
where we shall be moving shortly; I saw vistas
of possibilities, terrorizing all with my singing –
even worse than before
I could be a person whose retirement will be in
the interest of the state due to deterioration of
work performance, not due to her own fault;
the state will be better off without me
An official who is “burning” with too much
motivation, unable to concentrate or focus
on work – that will be me; I’m burning
already, give me the karaoke machine
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poem by Margaret Alice
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Family: The SMS-Messages Start...
It is still dark when we leave home - the
school gate is barely open; an hour and
a half before school starts a little boy
already there; out in the winter cold; then
a little girl is also left half an hour before
her school starts; in the afternoon he goes
to after-school; but she has to stay in the
school grounds; at two-forty-five the SMS-
messages start: Hi mom, what are you
doing? - I’m typing my love, and you? –
I’ve got nothing to do; - I know that’s
not true with all that maths and homework
tasks, yet I play along; I wish she were
here or already at home instead of at
school all alone; that was the choice I
made as a working mom; if I give up
my job I’ll never find one again – it’s
all about quotas and race and not expertise
– besides, it is my whole social life – if
only school did not end at two in the
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poem by Margaret Alice
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Feelings And Love 21 June 2009
Masaru Emoto ‘The Secret Life of Water’ lives
next to my bed, every night I look at photos of
geometric water crystals formed when words -
You Are Beautiful – Innocence - Thank You
in Tagalog and Japanese - Marital Love -
are pasted on water containers
Staring at the beautiful crystals formed when
music was played to water before crystallised;
Wagner’s Ride of the Valkyries, Schubert’s
Ave Maria, Mendelssohn’s Wedding March,
Edelweiss and Amazing Grace, wishing I
knew what Whispering Hope
Langenhoven’s Lullaby for Liefstetjie and Die
Lorelei, Ich weiss nicht was soll es bedeuten
would have looked like, looking intently at
the hollow, suffocating image formed by
the word Hate – and the crocodile eye
resulting from September 11,2001
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poem by Margaret Alice
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Never Entrust A Confidence To Such A Callous Person
Why do people take delight in nurturing
all things negative, in propagating every
damning word that was said to them
in confidence?
It makes me wary of friends and family
even more wary of myself – am I like
this, if pressed in a family gathering,
will I also tell all how bad
Sister felt about mother’s rejection, how paranoid
mother supposedly was - I suppose I might, and
once again decide never to visit the family
to partake in general gossip
Your shock on hearing your sister and mother
attacked by a sister-in-law who wasn’t stopped
by your childhood hero – your elder brother -
showed how deep such attacks hurt
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poem by Margaret Alice
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Family Fantasy: The Magician of Reason
You were right, when you met them, the Queen of Hearts
and the Prince in disguise; you saw that the web she had
woven professing deep faith and love for humankind, with
so-called insight; was just an illusion, Alice believed her
of course, believing herself to be as bad as the Prince called
a beast by her mom, who proclaimed herself a beautiful
enchantress set on redemption, she declared both child and
man demon-possessed; she wove the most scary, irrational,
illogical, mind-boggling fantasy about his Princely self as a
beast and his daughter, Alice-in-Wonderland, as a minion of
hell; presenting her mother, Cinderella, as a nasty old hag
and using her as a drudge, Alice used to sink in the sludge
of the Queen of Heart’s self-righteous rejection - until
the Magician of Reason opened her eyes by giving her the
elixir of reality; taught her to observe faithfully – that brought
Alice more joy than the Queen’s wicked fantasies…
poem by Margaret Alice
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