Is There Life on Mars?
Up Up Up and Up into outer space
one giant leap for man and the human race,
blasting up towards that heavenly place
did you see aliens or angels face to face?
What's it like to walk on the Moon
do you think there's life on Mars or Neptune?
is time in space really fast or very slow
answers to questions wed all like to know.
When your so high amongst the stars in the sky
are you in awe, do you wonder, do you ask why?
they say you can feel the presence of God
when floating about in your space capsule pod.
From tiny Pluto to the red planet of Mars
Comets, Black Holes, and Shooting Stars,
mysteries and wonders so far away
where twenty four hours don't make up a day.
But after all of these years what do we find?
that there's no other life to worry mankind
but rockets still ascend up so high
leaving us earthlings to ask the question why?
poem by Kevin Halls
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Aren't dreams great?
Some people say they don't have them
while others don't remember them at all
but I dream vividly every single night
and not just about women and Football.
A lot of my dreams can be really scary
like being chased by a giant Rat or Snake
or seeing a three headed alien being
and he's attacking me with a huge garden Rake.
I often dream about famous film stars
like Marilyn Monroe, Marlon Brando, Mae West,
I'm the leading actor and Hollywood heart throb
and Monroe whispers to me that I'm the best.
I often dream about children and animals
and they are usually jolly and full of fun
but I also have the occasional nightmare
when my little nephew turns into Atilla the Hun.
But we're told dreams are nothing to worry about
and it's not a sign that we are going insane
so that's really good news to me then
as last night I was Tarzan and my son was Jane!
poem by Kevin Halls
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Sammy the Shammy
Up and down the ladders he goes
making sure the windows are clean
he's got some stories to tell I bet
about all the things he has seen.
But he takes pride in his work
and he's always there on time
as long as he get's a nice cuppa
he'll get rid of all that dirt and grime.
Always friendly and chatty
the old ladies think he's a star
they secretly get all excited
as he takes his gear out of his car.
They offer him lots of cake
and endless cups of tea
he brightens up their day
with his banter and his squeegee.
He flirts with the housewifes
but it's only a bit of fun
because an irate husband
could shoot him with a gun.
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poem by Kevin Halls
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A strange object in the sky
People were streaming out onto the streets
all looking nervously upwards at the sky
some were pointing others transfixed
as children cried shouting 'Are we going to die? '
What was this strange spherical object?
all Yellow and shining so bright
was it some kind of alien being?
whatever it was it looked an awesome sight.
It was giving out a strong warm heat
which contrasted to all the usual rain
people were saying they'd seen it before
not here in England but in Portugal and Spain.
Then after a few days the object went away
leaving some people badly burnt and Red
but Astronomers and experts gave the thing a name
it was a Star called the Sun they all said.
So it wasn't a scary Alien threat after all
and some people even longed for it's return
but they said the only bad thing about it was,
it made their bodies hot, skin peel, and face burn!
poem by Kevin Halls
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Down the Pub on a Saturday Night
Saturday night in the pub
lots of things going on
lads playing pool
couple of older gents
playing dominoes.
A gang of drunken girls
walk in all wearing Pink
they're out on a hen night
they shout a lot then there off.
Football's on the television
so the pubs fairly full tonight
and as there's two big screens
you watch one then the other.
The smokers stand outside
puffing away at their fags
but as it's raining hard
their soon back inside.
Two blokes start arguing
punches are thrown
it gets broken up
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poem by Kevin Halls
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Have I got swine flu?
Your coughing and sneezing
and your head is pounding away
but you can't go to the doctors
if you do there will be hell to pay.
It used to be plain old influenza
you could get rid of it in a week
but this thing is related to a pig
so watch out for the signs of a squeak.
I think i may well have got it
because I've begun to wallow in mud
and I hate the smell of bacon
but I'd eat truffles all day if I could.
The diagnosis isn't looking good
I've been told to stay in and not go out
still they say it should clear up soon
but I'll be left with a tail and a snout.
I'll probably end up in a slaughterhouse
just a piece of meat on a hook
then on to the local butchers shop
as pork sausages all ready to cook.
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poem by Kevin Halls
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A wet slobbery kiss
I was sat dozing in the chair
enjoying my afternoon siesta
quickly I fell into a deep sleep
and into my thoughts came Esther.
She was someone from the past
and she was my very first love
she looked just like an angel
with wings like a heavenly dove.
I was mesmerised by her beauty
and by her long golden hair
and when she whispered my name
I began to float through the air.
She took hold of my hand
and said we're together at last
we don't need the present
we can return to our past.
Then we floated to the ground
and both of our bodies did glow
but a loud voice proclaimed
it's time for you to go.
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poem by Kevin Halls
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Albert's Allotment
Albert loved being on his allotment
he'd be on his plot everyday of the week
growing Cauliflower, Parsnip, Cabbage,
and winning awards for his Carrots, and Leek.
He spent so much time on his allotment
his wife thought he was having an affair
but Albert was more interested in his Potatoes
than any curvy woman with long Blonde hair.
When it rained Albert sat in his shed
reading Gardening books and having a cuppa
then he'd be out again digging for hours
till his wife called him in for his supper.
Albert liked growing all sorts of vegetables
but his favourite of the lot was the Marrow
he could grow them so big and so large
that some wouldn't fit into his Wheelbarrow.
Albert is buried down on his beloved allotment
as that was to be his final dying wish
when tearfully his wife asked him why he replied:
'So I can keep an eye on my Runner Beans and Radish! '
poem by Kevin Halls
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Catching Frogs and Sticklebacks
Looking back on those childhood years
What a wonderful time we had
Who could climb the highest tree?
Got no fear when just a lad.
No time to say I'm really bored
What with Football and Cricket to play
Tomorrow we're all going bird nesting
Found out where there's eggs of a Jay.
The summer days always seemed so hot
Lasting from June till late September
Catching frogs and Sticklebacks
And chasing Butterflies I do remember.
Scrumping apples from down the lane
And knocking doors and running away
That's as bad as we all got
Fairly tame compared with things today.
No such thing as a play station
D.V.D'S, Computers, or Mobile Phone
You were too busy out doing stuff
When it got dark that's when you went home.
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poem by Kevin Halls
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The lonely old lady
She sits in her favourite chair
her dog lies by her slippered feet
a cup of tea in an arthritic hand.
The television is on in the corner
she sees it as a very close friend
talking to the newsreader about her day.
She stares over at the telephone
praying that someone will call
it hasn't rung for a long time.
The postman has just been
she wishes he'd come in for a chat
but people are so busy these days.
The pretty weather girl is talking
it's going to be a hot and sunny day
the old lady tells her she looks nice.
Struggling to get to her aching feet
she looks out of her living room window
people and cars go quickly by.
Sitting back down in her favourite chair
she bends to pick up her little dog
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poem by Kevin Halls
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