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Herbert Nehrlich

There was an old granny named Flo
she came down with gangrene on her toe,
so she went to the dentist
who was known as adventist
and he said 'it's a tooth for a toe.'

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On the bridge of his boat stood the Skipper
with a stainless steel wide open zipper.
He was eyeing a wave
when an elderly slave
yelled 'I think I am seeing a ripper'.

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There is little of time we receive
and it never will grant a reprieve.
If you take some, as such
now and then (but not much) ,
you will never have time up your sleeve.

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He pushed and he strained and he struggled
and she wiggled and giggled and juggled
but they did not succeed
to take care of their need
all four of their hemispheres boggled.

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When the shoe salesman looked up her dress,
he said 'Beautiful, I must confess,
I would love to climb higher
and eventually sire
little monsters with you for Lochness.'

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A professor, quite brilliant but odd
loved the nightlife, the dirty old sod.
In the day he was thinking
and at night he was drinking.
In between he would pray to his God.

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He was scheduled to get a new kidney,
though he tried to obtain one from Whitney,
fifty million car parts
but no kidneys or hearts,
so he got his new kidney in Sydney.

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A Jack Russell was heard in the dark.
He would bark on the beach at a shark.
When he ventured too close
he was grabbed by the nose
in the end there was just one more bark.

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When the plane which was supersonic
reached top speed they were drinking Gin Tonic,
as they fell from the sky
it was whiskey and rye
for the ones on the ground - how ironic.

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Any doctor today must have stealth,
as he deals with his patients' ill health.
Let me tell you, my friend
what goes on in the end,
it's a state-sanctioned transfer of wealth.

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